Apology to Humankind

Dear Humankind,

At precisely 17:01 PST on Saturday May 30th I was not on a bus. I had vanilla pudding. I had a spoon. My wife was ready with the camera and we stood helpless, waiting at the bus stop. As the time drew near we frantically discussed the options and the potential ramifications and decided that the best course of action was to take my picture eating the pudding as I walked backwards towards the South. When the bus finally did come (10 minutes late) we quickly climbed aboard and executed the required task at 17:04 and 8 seconds. This 3 minute and 8 second time lag has certainly had a negative affect on directional magnetism. Please adjust your compasses accordingly.

It's tempting to blame the Seattle Metro system and be done with it, however I must take some responsibility. At about 16:45 PST I made a decision I will regret for the rest of my life. In a moment of pure foolishness I elected not to board the previous bus and thus let the fate of the universe hinge on the precision of the Seattle Metro. Any of you who have ridden the bus know that this was not a good idea. Fortunately, it appears that my mistake has not caused any permanent damage. According to my calculations, we were able to partially realign the magnetic anomaly, however you may notice a slight pull towards the south and some GPS glitches in certain rural areas. Don't fret though. Gibson-OZ and I will be in contact soon to figure out a way to get things back on track.

Regarding the vanilla pudding -- good consistency, no lumps, delicious.

Once again, I apologize for this unfortunate situation. I will do everything in power to never let it happen again.

Until next time,
Gibson-US

Southern Hemisphere Saved!

Revenge may be a dish best served cold, but the same cannot be said for chocolate pudding.

Anticipation got the best of me on the night of Saturday, May 30 AEST and after several steadying glasses of wine, I decided to pre-prepare my pudding. All went smoothly and the end result was simply stunning - a moist, fluffy specimen which filled the kitchen with the wonderful smell of cocoa and melted dark chocolate. In a gesture of solidarity with Gibson US, I even wore my Pike Place Markets apron for the occasion.

However, in the cold light of the wintery Sydney sun, the pudding looked very much like I felt - flat, cold and crusty. In an attempt to recapture a fraction of its former glory, I returned the pudding to the oven on a low heat. This had an effect similar to placing a dead bird in the sun for an hour. Still, I resolved to take a bullet to my tastebuds and in the interests of global safety, placed a portion of the once proud pudding in a container and set out for the bus stop at 0925 AEST on Sunday, May 31.

The 333 is a fine bus route. Departing from the beach in Bondi, it travels west through Paddington, down the famous Oxford Street and then strikes north to enter Sydney city. At 1001, the 333 had entered the northern section of its journey and I was able to take a bite of the lukewarm chocolate pudding upon which the fate of the word rested. My accomplice, shaking as a result of the excitement of the moment, managed to snap a record of the moment.

The other passengers on the 333 remained blissfully unaware of the magnitude of the morning's event, as did the man in the background of this photo who, despite working in the cold of the morning, inexplicably elected to wear only a polo shirt.

Pudding and Magnets: An Unlikely Threat!

In 1904, British physicist J.J. Thompson proposed what has since become known as the Plum Pudding Model of the atom. Though this model was thought to have been disproved in 1911, we have recently uncovered disturbing evidence indicating that all may not be as it has seemed.

Acting under advice from NASA and the National Institute for Theoretical Physics, we are unable to state full details at this stage. However, we can reveal that a magnetic anomaly at the atomic level threatens to wreak global havoc if not corrected soon.

Considering that plums are out of season in both Australia and the U.S., we have opted to enact the hitherto theoretical Chocolate/Vanilla Pudding Paradox to combat this molecular menace. In layman's terms, the Paradox works like this:

* Both Gibsons prepare a home-made pudding. Gibson-US makes a vanilla pudding, Gibson-OZ makes a chocolate pudding.
* At precisely 0001 on Sunday, May 31st GMT the Gibsons must consume their puddings on public busses. Gibson-US must be traveling south, Gibson-OZ must be traveling north.
* If all goes according to plan, the anomaly will be neutralised and life will continue uninterrupted.

As usual, we will provide photographic evidence and a mission report for posterity (assuming, of course, that communication is still possible).

Success in Medewi. Reportage delayed.

Firstly, apologies for the late posting. There is no internet in Medewi, Indonesia, and I had to wait until my return to Kuta to post.

Although you wouldn't tell from the half-foot wave breaking in the background, the surf was pretty amazing at 0732 WITA on the appointed day. As a result, the hardest part of completing this challenge was resisting the temptation to pick up my board and head out for a session. The second hardest part was explaining to the Indonesian cow farmer the reasoning behind my wanting him to wait until a certain moment before taking my picture. Luckily for everyone, the language barriers were somewhat overcome and by taking the picture, the farmer unknowingly became part of the catalyst for economic recovery in the world (actually, he was an immediate beneficiary when I pressed some rupiah into his hand as thanks).

The cow seemed to sense that history was in the making and turned to face me as the photo was taken. It was wearing a handsome blue handmade bell.

The item I am holding is a deck of Indonesian playing cards (I'll post a detailed view later) which I purchased the previous day for 15,000 rupiah - about A$1.90/US$1.40 from the little bamboo shop owned by the family of Putu, the local surfboard repairer. The cards are a low-to-mid range quality cardboard with a decent slip and feature a traditional looking design versa. There are 3 jokers in the deck. Later in the night they were used by myself, my 2 Australian travelling companions, 3 Israelis, 1 Belgian and 2 Indonesian Muslims to play a card game - proving that not only did the challenge help the economic recovery, but also (as an unexpected side effect) aided in improving Jewish/Muslim relations.

There was no pre-meditation involved in my having worn the same hat and sunglasses as in last month's challenge.

Report From Oaxaca

Well, it wasn't easy, but as you can see from the photo above I was successful in completing my half of the mission. The souvenir I procured is right up there with some of the worst I've seen. I've included a close-up to give you some idea of just how horrendous it truly is. It's a pen featuring a stereotypical Mexican figure sucking down a shot glass of Mezcal. Notice the distended belly and pumpkin head of the figure and the crude carving of the word Oaxaca that reads from bottom to top. I paid 20 pesos for it, which comes out to about $1.50 US or $2.10 Australian dollars.

The photo was taken at exactly 6:32pm CDT outside of the Santo Domingo cathedral in Oaxaca City. Being Good Friday, we were among the throngs of people gathered to witness the big processional. With about 10 minutes until the appointed time, I began scanning the crowd for animals of any kind. Things were looking grim until I walked around the church and saw a couple relaxing on a curb with their dog. Would they stay long enough? My photographer/wife framed the shot and we waited for an anxious five minutes. Literally seconds after the shot was taken, they stood up and walked away. Whew! Disaster averted!

Immediately after the picture was taken I noticed that many people were purchasing things. I assume that this is a direct result of the effect of GvsG on the global economy. Those that witnessed my strange one-legged pose may have thought it silly… if only they'd known how important it actually was.

Mark Your Calendars!

After pouring over our data and crunching the numbers, it is clear to us that the next mission must take place on Friday, April 10, 2009, at precisely 23:32 GMT. This time, your intrepid heroes will venture to separate exotic locales in an effort to stabilize the global economy. OZ–Gibson will be traveling to a remote village on the island of Bali while US–Gibson will be on location in Oaxaca, Mexico.

The mission is twofold:
1) Purchase a particularly awful souvenir.
2) At precisely 23:32 GMT, pose with said souvenir while balancing on one leg (US–Gibson will stand on right leg, OZ–Gibson will stand on left leg) with an animal somewhere nearby.

As you can plainly see from the details above, if we succeed with our mission, the global economy should see immediate improvement.

Photographic documentation and a debriefing by the Gibsons will be posted on this blog as soon as they both can locate internet access. Note: OZ–Gibson might not be able to report on the status of his mission until a week or so after the event.

Thanks for your support.

Safe for now, but there's more trouble brewing...

Well, folks, it looks like our first mission was a success and that equilibrium has been restored to the planet. And while this is cause for some celebration, our data seems to indicate that another anomaly threatens to warp the space/time continuum in the not-too-distant future...perhaps as early as early April.

Stay alert, not alarmed, but mostly stay tuned.